VDS is going to Manage Me!

It will soon be Christmas Day and I cannot wait to spend the whole day with my family.  Up until this year I have always felt very stressed out on the run up to Christmas, worrying whether my gifts will be liked and whether I have bought enough for everyone and whether there is going to be enough food and nibbles and….it just went on and on and on. 

Every year my fears were totally unjustified.  Everyone always got what they wanted, there was always enough presents and more than enough food and nibbles to last us through to the New Year and beyond!

This year is different.  This year I am learning to let go of the stress.  I just don’t need it in my life.  I have made sure that everyone has the one gift that they wanted; I haven’t gone overboard on the stocking fillers – mainly because I have actually misplaced the stockings!  The food is being dealt with by my hubby who traditionally always does the cooking (all year actually, I don’t like cooking at all) and it is going to be a much less stressful event all round.

I didn’t even need to put up the decorations this year, the boys did it all – and even more remarkable is that I haven’t had to re-do anything – my OCD is being taught a lesson, I cannot control everything and I don’t even want to anymore, it’s exhausting!

So I am spending the remaining few weeks of 2014 having a good long hard think about how I want to progress my future and the ways that I can make 2015 work better for me than the last few years have…I have goals and ambitions like everyone else but I think previously I have set that bar way too high to be SMART – and in particular, achievable. 

This has led to me feeling disheartened and disappointed with myself that resulted in me basically giving up, trying to reassess and then later down the line reigniting my initial goal and having wasted all that time trying to act ‘carefree’ when in actual fact I was just in denial.  It is true what they say ‘sometimes you are your own worst enemy’ – I absolutely am!

How am I going to do things different this time?  I have no idea but I am hoping that a little honesty with myself will go a long way to helping me achieve what I want, why I want it and how I’m going to get it! 

I am dedicating my VDS Manager - Vivacious Development System Manager – to actually manage me.  I need this soooo much!!  I have the Manager for home use, getting into the nitty gritty of it all and the Senior to act as my satellite where I write down all my urgent issues, thoughts, important musings, etc. Alone we are just that, alone but together we are a team and we can help, support and guide me through this transformation of MEH to WOW!

These two are going to help me sort myself out ONCE AND FOR ALL!!

I will be documenting my progress on my blog and I may use a separate smaller planner as my fitness log that lives in my gym bag and is dedicated solely to that...with a quick marker in my calendar of my VDS Manager just to keep an eye on progress...

Until then, take care xxx